Farewell to Another ...

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,

and never brought to mind?

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,

and auld lang syne*?

CHORUS:

For auld lang syne, my jo,

for auld lang syne,

we'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet,

for auld lang syne.

And surely ye'll be your pint-stoup!

and surely I'll be mine!

And we'll tak' a cup o’ kindness yet,

for auld lang syne.

CHORUS

We twa hae run about the braes,

and pou'd the gowans fine;

But we've wander'd mony a weary fit,

sin' auld lang syne.

CHORUS

We twa hae paidl'd in the burn,

frae morning sun till dine;

But seas between us braid hae roar'd

sin' auld lang syne.

CHORUS

And there's a hand, my trusty fiere!

and gie's a hand o' thine!

And we'll tak' a right gude-willie waught,

for auld lang syne.

- Robert Burns

For some the New Year will but another ticking of the clock. A mere awakening to another sunrise. It will be but a whisper in their mind that the day merely marks a mental note to change not only the day, month when signing the date, but to also adjust the year. 

For many it will mark the end of a year. An end of a year that was filled with tragedy. It was filled with devastating news, both abroad and in their own nation. For many it is much closer to home. It marks the end of the year where they lost a loved one, lost a child, lost employment, lost a relationship, lost good health and a plethora of many other things that we could add to the list that would label 2016 as "the worst year ever".

For others they will look back as their "best year yet" as they felt blessed with many of life's joys. Their year marked many beginnings, it marked many firsts that brought absolute joy. The year saw for them relationships grow, births, homes made and health just get better and better. It was a year that will be memorable as year of absolute wonderment for it brought so much happiness, and with hope the following year will bring just as much joy, but will most likely pale in comparison. 

For many it will mark a new beginning. A chance to make new relationships, new health promises, work commitments, a year to plan holidays, to celebrate good health or recovery. It will be a chance to find new hope inhumanity. It will be a chance to renew commitments. Or even a chance to completely remake oneself.

The artwork above devotes itself to farewelling anger. There is a glow surrounding the two people walking the long stretch of the path. The darker colours dissipate towards the bright illuminous oranges, yellows and reds of the trees and path. The couple walk together, side by side into the bright hope at the end of the cobbled road. Although I feel there are many reasons for me to look back on 2016 with anger, frustration, exhaustion and sadness, I also look back on a year that had many joys. It was a year filled with great achievements and small glimpses of joy in everyday life. However, more than the highs and lows comes to me an even greater reflection. I see a year that shaped me. It has shaped me to be a person who can look ahead into 2017. I want to try not to look on 2016 and dwell on what it did not achieve, or lament the bad decisions I made, or brood over all that went wrong. I want to look back on 2016 and acknowledge the pain, the anger, the hurt, the frustration, the loss as it has matured me and I want to reminisce on the joys, hopes, growth and accomplishments that have refined me. 

I farewell 2016 as it should be farewelled and I welcome a new year that will bring many more experiences, be they failing or uplifting. 

Farewell to Anger- Leonid Afremoz (2015)

Tsunami

It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

Noel Coward

I stood this evening at my local beach watching the pattern of waves make way to shore. I stood expectantly as they came closer to the rocks and pool to see a spray of white wash being forced into the air, but it did not come. The waves for some reason died down as they approached the rocks, obviously the perpetual force dwindling.

I have lived on the coast all my life and I can never imagine leaving it. I can watch the waves crashing to shore for what would seem like a life time. I love looking at the tide lines gradually creep in and then gradually move out. I like observing the change in colour as the water reflects the weather and hides the deep. There is an uncertainty about the ocean and often it is referred to as unpredictable.

Growing up near the water and also as the daughter of an oceanographer/climatologist and being married to an environmental scientist has taught me a lot about the predictability of the ocean. The ocean works with predictability. I will not claim by any means to understand its complexity but for some reason there is so much about the ocean that offers me time for reflection amidst the turbulence of life.

This week was a turbulent week and it felt like the shoreline was not offered any respite or given any reprieve from the bombardment of waves. The outgoing current and sandbank did not seem to reduce the impact and I have come out the other end weathered and slightly eroded. By no means has my week suffered the natural disaster like many others I know. My storm was merely that; a continuation of repetitive swells that barrelled and white washed the fine grains of sand. This storm can be recovered from with little damage and minor impact. It is often thought that once eroded there is no repair, the damage is done. However, although the rough seas and high tides remove form the shoreline. The calm gentle even spilling breakers gradually restore it. Sand deposits move back in with calm water building the fringe where water meets land.

The tsunami however, changes the landscape forever. It leaves a path of devastation, everything  at the mercy of the sharp generated insurgence of water. It destroys. The havoc wrecked by this natural occurring event is not even fully realised or comprehended till weeks, months or even years later.  It requires the coming together of communities and countries to try and bring back some normality. Normality will never come. Everyone has to be willing to change to create a new normal, a new life, a new expectation of what the future will hold.

How can I tell if my week is merely a squall, a storm that will pass by the light of the new day? or if it is the devastating tsunami. I think we can definitely define devastating quite clearly in some instances: loss of a home, loss of a loved one, loss of a country, loss of a friendship, loss of a marriage, loss of a child, gaining of an illness. There are many more that I think could be added. However, I find it sometimes hard when it comes to anxiety the ability to determine what is the passing storm and what is the tsunami. For many events it can feel like a continual tsunami where no gathering of help has had the chance to occur and rebuild before being knocked down again with the wall of water. This is a hard thing with anxiety, the ability to rationalise the severity of events dwindles and everything can become a continual fall into the depths of the spinning whirlpool created by the tsunami.

Beware this trap. It is not one that can often be empathised with, nor is it one that many people around us can withstand for long. It has the appearance of selfishness, while none is intended. It seems like neediness, when just a friendly smile, hug or embrace was required. It came seem like ungratefulness when there is so much thanks even within the continual droning whinge that comes from the tongue. It is important and necessary that we continue to try and think "is what I am experiencing a mere storm that I will be able to withstand and recover from, or is it a tsunami, in which case more assistance is required, a community of support, more than just our closest friends. Although our closest friends and family are still a great necessity during these times. Regardless of situation we need to try and determine the difference in our life of a storm or a tsunami.